9/11, Never Forget Evil

When I was a little kid, I had a friend named Ron. Ron was different, unique and interesting. All people appeared this way to me at that time. Ron stole a pair of shorts from my mother’s clothesline. My mother’s friend caught Ron downtown and yelled at him, “nice shorts!,” and then drove off. I didn’t understand why Ron didn’t get to have a colorful pair of shorts. He was different, unique and interesting like me. Then they cut my hair. I cried, “I look like a bald-headed monkey.” My grandfather said, “his hair was so long because of the Indians up there.” They sent me to a Catholic school. I’m white. My language was stolen from me. My culture was stolen from me. My friends were stolen from me.

15 Comments

ractalfece

about 7 months ago

I became a spiritual orphan behind enemy lines,
a mosquito whispered in my ear that I'd always be alone
and that I'd never be abandoned

isthisme

about 6 months ago

I have an idea. You should try reading this in a video, possibly without a shirt and spoken in a Lou Reed-esque vibe with some lame Creative Commons music going on behind it that sounds like the demo on a cheap Walmart keyboard.

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

I will never be Anishinaabe
and I strive everyday to be Anishinaabe,
humble before the Creator

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

but my evil desires are limitless and my ego knows no bounds

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

in the ravine, i bow my head
on the cliff, I bow my head

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

and i offer my blood to the swarm

isthisme

about 5 months ago

Hey Ractal, how about doing your old fans a solid and posting all the old content on totalvom, huh buddy?

isthisme

about 5 months ago

Or maybe it's time for some new material. We could bake up a tater t**t hot dish, drive out to Cali, and surprise Cathy with it in person ... guessing she has moved on by now, probably married some dork and had a few kids. The look on her face would be solid gold!!!

isthisme

about 5 months ago

C'mon Ractal, we can't live the rest of our lives on just eat my sharts and the split with Sam and Luke ... we can't even see your shirtless torso in those.

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

I won patronage of an eagle nit from a network of bugs. Shut the fuck up.

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

See how terrible I am? I'm sorry to anyone reading this. I will pray more.

isthisme

about 5 months ago

That's OK Ractal. Now quit acting like a 14-year-old who just discovered Jim Morrison and get to posting your old content on totalvom.

ractalfece

about 5 months ago

My apology does not mean you are not an idiot

isthisme

about 5 months ago

You mad bruh? Is it because I mentioned Cathy? Sorry dude, I was thinking of you like a comic book character from the internet who made funny vids and not like a real person with feelings. I apologize as well.  

I'm seriously an old fan from back in the day. You even replied to one of my comments in one of your vids back in like 2008. I hope you're doing well and hope you post the old content or at least make new content somewhere eventually. *handshake*

ractalfece

about 4 months ago

I'm going through it, having my white boy grieving session. I don't mean to hold onto this stuff or claim an identity but it happened. Writing about it, centers my white pain, I'm aware of this. But I'm going through it. Maybe I should privately. I don't know. 

What happened when I was a kid was that I went to Central Elementary school in Bemidji. I was good at learning Ojibwe and won an award for it. We danced around a drum in the gym and it was so much fun. The principal of our school thought kids should not do homework. In 3rd grade I was transferred to St. Philip's where I learned that hell is real. I'm coming to terms with how racism has wrecked my spirit, as a white person. 

It's a sickness. You can't place some people above other people without also having that attitude pervade your entire group. To me, family, friends and community are just a bunch of twisted personalities, only looking out for themselves, waiting for a chance to step on your head to boost themselves up. This is not the way for humans to live.

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