Aquaman Saves the City

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-1vPhSfJJo

I saw broken bottles underwater at a popular Lake Superior swimming spot in Duluth. A few days later I was able to return and used my powers for good to clean up after the bad guys. You can either wade in at the shallow end of this spot, or rock-jump in at the deep end, either way there was broken glass within reach of innocent bare feet. It was the remains of at least five separate beer bottles, probably from one douchebag at a party of cowards.

I spent about three hours collecting all the glass I could in dives lasting 30-45 seconds each with rests to catch my breath in between. I couldn’t get it all, there were many shards too small to pick up, but they will wash away most easily into the deep. All of it would have turned into smooth beach glass sooner or later, or been sucked out to sea by the next storm, but in the meantime this mess sat there for several days and could have easily lacerated someone. I was very careful picking it up, but obviously it was a little risky and the wave action was moving me around quite a bit (good thing my Atlantean physiology is adapted to the pressure at great depths, so my skin can even resist machine gun fire).

Be warned: I protect this lake, and those who come here. If I catch anyone breaking glass at the beach I will not hesitate to call the police. Either that or I will telepathically summon a giant catfish to eat you.

Local news spot here.

11 Comments

  1. hbh1 hbh1 on September 2, 2013 at 11:18 am

    Thanks, Aquaman!

  2. emmadogs emmadogs on September 2, 2013 at 4:03 pm

    Watching the SuperFriends on Saturday morning TV as kids, my brothers and I wondered what the point of Aquaman was. Now I see!

    Our hero, Aquaman! And seriously, thank you for doing this.

  3. heysme on September 2, 2013 at 10:21 pm

    You, Mr. Richardson, are a true friend of the lake. Thank you for your stewardship!

  4. lojasmo on September 3, 2013 at 8:35 pm

    Good deeds never go unpunished. Expect a looting charge forthcoming.

  5. Laurie Stribling Laurie Stribling on September 4, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    Hi Jim. I’m with WDIO in Duluth. I would love to talk with you today about this! You can call me at (218) 348-7847. Or email me at [email protected].

  6. Jim Richardson Jim Richardson on September 4, 2013 at 4:50 pm

    Nice to see you Laurie. PDD’ers, Laurie’s story on me will run at 10 tonight, check it out! Regards to all kind surface-dwellers.

  7. Barrett Chase Barrett Chase on September 5, 2013 at 7:19 am

  8. Fitz Fitz on September 5, 2013 at 9:54 am

    Jim, I love your videos but I loved your ability to stay in character during the news piece even more.

  9. Ramos Ramos on September 5, 2013 at 10:17 am

    I’m tempted to toss a bottle into Lake Superior just to watch Aquaman summon the giant catfish.

  10. Paul Lundgren Paul Lundgren on September 5, 2013 at 10:30 am

    Aquaman, while you’re down there can you pull up the rest of those barrels the Dept. of Defense dumped between 1959 and ’62? There are only about 1,400 of them. Be careful handling the cluster-bomb detonators inside, by the way.

  11. spy1 spy1 on September 5, 2013 at 10:37 am

    Aquaman and the Joker. My mind has been blown.

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