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New Study Indicates Science Wrong about ‘Pretty Much Everything Health-Related’

A recently published study in Scientific Facts Daily has scientists around the world shaking their heads in befuddlement and dismay. Marshaling the combined data from more than 50 years and 73,000 scientific papers summarizing more than 100,000 scientific studies, the work concludes that scientific studies on the efficacy of consuming more or less of certain food types, adding nutrients or nutritional supplements to one’s diet, or using certain medicines to treat disease are all “pretty much wrong.”

“Like, almost completely wrong, every time,” chief researcher Dr. Martina Ferkes-Boothe, an international expert on hypertension, indicated. “Seriously,” Ferkes-Booth continued, “If I wasn’t a scientist myself, I’d think someone was making this shit up. First, we tell everyone not to eat fat or cholesterol, or they’ll have a heart attack and die. People were choking down those cardboard Lean Cuisine low-fat pizzas for like a decade. Totally wrong. Could have been eating real cheese, instead of that weird soy snot, the whole time. And don’t even start in on butter made out of yogurt. So many fucked up mashed potatoes. I feel just awful about it now.”

Juice Pharm taking over Vintage Kitchen space

JuicePharm

Set aside the biscuits and gravy, and get ready for freshly squeezed. The Juice Pharm has announced it’s taking over the space formerly occupied by Vintage Kitchen at 12 S. 15th Ave. E.

Getting “juiced” at the Red Herring takes on new meaning

Giselle Hernandez

Giselle Hernandez

Most Americans fail miserably at consuming the USDA’s recommended 2 cups of fruit and 2.5-3 cups of vegetables per day. Beginning June 27, Twin Ports residents striving to meet this goal can opt for fruit and veggies in liquid form from the Juice Pharm.

Giselle Hernandez is the certified nutritionist behind the juicery, which will operate out of the Red Herring Lounge at 208 E. First St. Hernandez became interested in nutrition and eating whole foods during a hospital stay after a bad car accident. She soon tired of unhealthy, bland hospital fare and was thankful when a friend’s mother brought her supplements like coconut water and green drinks. She says these healthy options improved her energy and credits them with speeding her healing process.

When Hernandez recovered, she decided to study nutrition. She got her certification from the Natural Healing Institute in California. When she moved to Duluth three years ago, she was surprised the juice bar trend hadn’t reached the city. She says drinking juice has many benefits, one of the primary being illness prevention. She advocates juicing as a way to “get people to eat better and nourish the body with whole foods.”

Spaghetti dinner & silent auction benefit

When: Friday, May 8th

Time: 5-7pm

Where: Mr D’s 5622 Grand Ave. Duluth

What:  fundraiser for the Kari Hart family

Many of you know the Hart family. They are such a blessing to so many people and have always been willing to help others in need.
Kari was diagnosed with Gall Bladder Cancer and so far medical bills have exceeded $400,000. Terry has missed half his workdays to care for Kari since January 2008.
There will be a Spaghetti Dinner Fundraiser at Mr. D’s along with a silent auction. There are 100’s of items to bid on in the auction including a Cirrus Disign scenic flight for three! Suggested donation for the dinner is $10. I hope you can come!

just a few other gifts and certificates:

Healing Hands Massage, Superior
Burger King
Beaner’s
The Shack Supper Club
Duluth Grill
Athlete’s Foot
Alicia Ligman Pampered Chef
Carlson’s Floor Center
The Reader
Keyport Liquor
Grandma’s Saloon & Grill
and so many more!

For more information or to donate call:
Robin: 218-391-3077

Donations may be sent to:
Kari Hart Medical Fund
MCCU
215 N. 40th Ave. W.
Duluth, MN 55807