Broken car windows — 3:30 a.m. 6/12 — Lakeside

We need a Batman.

Loon(wo)Man.  or GullMan.

Maybe all three -- and add Bear(wo)Man just to represent the mammals and add excitement.

Just to add some super hero biodiversity I would also suggest Trout-Dude with his sidekick Herring-Boy.

Smeltman.

Mutant Giant Tent Caterpillar

Lamprey Face.

Or how about....

PerfectDuluthDay(wo)Man!!!

OUR HERO!!!

...you'll need really cool costumes though.  And an awesome car and/or helicopter.

The Zebra Mussel Avenger.  They're slow, but inexorable.

This is so great -- like a verbal comic book! I too love Perfect Duluth Day, as others have recently said (emmadogs I think)...

So...does anyone know anything about the window-smashing?

Crimemapping.com shows about 10 vandalisms occurred in Lakeside that night, including four that occurred within two blocks of Colorado Street. I guess that means school is out.

Was there a full moon?

I have not heard of any updates on this -- 10 in one night?? !!!! -- full moon was 6/4.

Way back in the distant 90s the aquarium had a dude(tte) known as the "Sturgeon General."  That could be the best thing that came out of that place.  And no, that's not necessarily a knock on the Aquarium, the character was just that awesome.  I'd like to see those kids smashing windows with a living breathing 6 foot tall Sturgeon (wo)man on their tails.

+1 to Fitz for using both zebra mussels and  inexorable on a blog post about criminals and fake superheroes.  Well played.

Date opened July 29, 2000.

It gets confusing. I still say "a few years ago" when I really mean 10.