“Greek Police Smash Violent Doughnut Ring”
THESSALONIKI – It took an undercover operation, but Greek police have blown a hole in a ring of alleged crooks who had cornered the doughnut market in a beach resort.
I hereby call upon Mayor Ness to offer asylum in Duluth to these industrious, probably misunderstood people, with an eye toward improving our own disastrous local donut market–their violent tendencies would presumably remain latent due to the absence of any competition to intimidate.
