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I Think You're All Wrong!



When distinct truthinesses collide or when two bullshit artists meet, pointless arguments generally follow. (The '85 Bears were the best football team ever; no, the '72 Dolphins were. Soccer is better than football. We must protect the sanctity of marriage; civil marriage is a civil right.) There are two basic attitudes toward passionate worldview collisions. One is a hard-fought truce, "Let's agree to disagree." The other is "You just don't get it," "You're biased," or, commonly, "Shut up and die," or "Fuck you." We know which temperament is more prevalent lately. Belligerence flows from bullshit.

--Dick Meyer, Why We Hate Us: American Discontent in the New Millennium

That said, I think Va Bene sucks. That pear sandwich thing? Ugh. Great view, sure, and the pasta bar is pretty deece, but for that price, I could boil some fricken noodles and make something so much better at home.

Than stay home and shut up. Oh, and 'Deece' is not hip or trendy, it's retarded. Congratulations.

Dick Meyer was on the Jim Bohannon show the other night. That book sounds really interesting.

Lemmy from Motörhead could sooo kick Dick Meyer's ass in Scottish dance off.

HB: I think while you're criticizing the words I write, the basic English word you're looking for is "then" not "than."

Any pasta joint that allows me to eat gnocchi and sip a doppio beside the fireplace can charge me a few bucks extra. Va Bene is well worth it.

Anchor burgers are not all that good. You only think that because the toppings are good and because they're fried in bacon grease. But the meat is substandard.

wait. when did that happen to 'deece'? i love that word so much it's ridic.

"deece" went the way of "rad" and "spaz," left behind in some John Hughes 80's film starring Molly Ringwald, or got lost in scripts for episodes of Degrassi Junior High and Saved By The Bell.

IMO...Buffalo House burgers rock my clock.

Hollister is the new Abercrombie...which I'm convinced is a cult.

My daughter makes a better door than a window when she stands in front of the television.

If everyone were required to take a test every time they got their driver's license there'd be a lot less cars on the road.


If you don't know how to drive it...don't friggin buy it!


If everyone were required to take the test every time they got their driver's license renewed...there'd be a lot less cars on the road.

sorry, it's early.

I am, without a doubt, the best driver on the planet. I am so good I don't need a license, but I have one anyway just so I can stare dreamily at my handsome picture.

Va Bene is a Va Ripoff.

Sir Ben's is a Sir Ripoff.

The new layout of Barrett's blog is boring.

I am tired of the menu at the Brewhouse. Update, please!

Luce' makes the best margheritas in town. But $6.50? For a bunch of lime juice?

These are my very important opinions.

PDD's comments on the sidebar annoy me when there's a comment I want to read on the sidebar but it hasn't appeared yet on the post.

Red stoplights are not a suggestion to stop and look both ways and then go.

Hell's Kitchen Restaurant (not the tv show!) is way overrated and having a crappy attitude for serving as your motto doesn't mean you can give *bad* service.

Abercrombie should change its name to "I'm A Crappy Stinkfish" because I can't breathe when I walk by there due to all the estrogen, perfume/cologne and testosterone wannabe emanating out of the doors.

Douglas Coupland is God.

Everyone on this blog should read "The Gutenberg Elegies" by Sven Birkets before they post one more thing.

Poopy diapers are teh worst!

you are all funny and so so so so correct.

"deece" is "choice"

I concur with Barrett. The "PROSCIUTTO E PEAR" What the "Va" were they thinking?

I'm going back to eating my cold and 3 day old Little Ceasar's pizza.

Hip Hop culture should not be embraced. It has caused problems, it does cause problems, and it will continue to cause problems as long as guns, violence, drugs, murder, rape, prison, misogyny, theft, greed, reverse-racism, anti-education, anti-authority, and pitiful grammar skills are glorified as lifestyle traits and personal achievements to be proud of.

You know what Barret, you're absolutely right. It was an asshole post I made and I'm sorry. From now I won't post anything I wouldn't be willing to say to your face, and if I was still in Duluth I'd invite you to Va Bene for some gelato.

If this is a discussion about food, then Bulldogs still makes the best pizza in town (it's even better the next day. Unfortunately it's overpriced.

ooooh! i use redic so much it's preposterous.

-Napolean Dynomite was'nt really a funny movie

-People who like Bacardi have never tried Sailor Jerry

-"Orange" is an incredibly generic name for a fruit

-Skateboarding is sometimes a crime

-I miss Axl

-Eighties boobs were different than modern boobs

-Fat people love DisneyWorld because the employees have to be nice to them

-KLAX is the most under-rated video game of all time

Did I see that there is a new cafe or restaurant open in the Sons of Norway building? I'll give it a closer look tonight and provide the full report in tomorrow's edition. Maybe I can get a Table for Two with T. Wilkowske. Also, important breaking news: I am opening a law practice in Duluth after several years of driving to and fro Cloquet. The office is called Schutz Law Office, e-mail is [email protected], the URL (still under construction) - is twinportslaw.com, phone number is (218) 213-7817 In the interest of not sounding like I desperately need your business, please send me your business. I focus on helping people through all sorts of trouble, in a discreet and respectful manner. Please call or e-mail for more information. I may even take you to lunch at one of the above eateries (including Va Bene, which IMO is squarely in my top fifteen in and around town). By the way, I'm pretty sure that this solicitation is unauthorized under the Minnesota Rules of Professional Responsibility. I've seen worse schilling, though.

They should leave bike racks on the buses year-round.

Erbert & Gerbert is way better than Subway, but kindof a tie with Quiznos.

As the seasons begin to change, it's time to give up the gin and tonics and switch to bourbon. Not bourbon and tonic though.

You should be allowed to wear white after labor day.

Eve, the snake and the fruit are the heroes of the Garden of Eden.

I wanna play, too:

1. I saw the name "Bucky Gunts" in the credits of the Olympics Closing Ceremony on Sunday. That simply cannot be real.

2. Tamara's new title for Abercrombie made me laugh so hard I almost spit out my coffee.

3. Why do I only get flat tires or car troubles on days where it's imperative that I have a working vehicle?

3.5. I wish like the dickens that I could just for once have a real boner.

3.75 I've never heard "deece" before, but I'm adopting it as my new favorite word.

4. Goddamn, my boobs itch today.

To a large degree...

- everyone thinks they are a doctor
- everyone thinks they are a lawyer
- everyone thinks they are a cook
- everyone thinks they are a poet
- everyone thinks they are a webmaster
- everyone thinks they are a politician
- everyone thinks that what they have to say on a blog is the most important thing to be heard

As for food and drink...

- The Anchor is the perfect place to bring your rich, anal, barbie date to
- Mr. Dee's and the like are great if you never grew up from the 80's but simply dress different now
- The Western is good if you haven't shaved
- The DAC is good if you have
- Brewhouse doesn't care either way
- Grandma's has poor taste but great kabobs
- Thai Krathong is not for loud drunks, but their food is damn good for a city regularly frowning upon ethnic and fusion foods (we're making steps, though)
- Thirsty Pagan's beer is overrated, but ambiance is awesome
- Chester Creek Cafe, umm, interesting for people who have money and want to act young and 'hip'; try their french toast, yum
- Burrito Union... lusty crowd, love it; slightly more manufactured, however, than Brewhouse
- Hell's kitchen may have been a mistake

I love (using sarcasm now) how people correct others' grammar in an attempt to dismantle their argument; make them lose clout in plain sight, as it were. Silly kats.

I'm excited about the new Greek restaurant that will be opening above RT's later this fall. The owner told me that they will be having a full Greek menu so that you can have tastes from all of the islands. That's gonna be tits!

I feel threatened by your use of the word "tits". I shall be contacting the PDD HR dept.

*Everyone thinks Superior sucks, yet they aren't in the midst of a massive budget shortfall.

*Thirsty Pagan's beer and ambiance is overrated, but their pizza is awesome.

*Gronks has much better burgers AND fries than The Anchor.

*Mini-van drivers are the worst on the road.

*American Eagle used to be fairly priced when it first opened, now it is rivaling Abercrombie, without the bumping music and over indulgence of colognes.

*Not all college students are inconsiderate loud idiots. The university (and its students) are a huge asset to Duluth. (And no, I didn't attend college here.)

*Seriously, Mayor Ness, you want to sell prized Duluth possessions, cut park and rec. departments, close libraries, etc. These are temporary solutions to permanent problems. Your campaign motto should have been, "Duluth ... I'll make it so you won't want to be here."

*This area is a great place to live, work and play - despite all the negative things happening here.

If you want to look like a gawking yokel in front of a PBS film crew, comb your mullet and come out to Beaner's tonight. No cover.

Every place thinks they have the most unpredictable weather.

"Subway-erbert-waah?? the only best sandwich is the Cajun Finn at Northern Waters Smokehaus"

"A new Greek restaraunt sounds choi- meet for a stinky-pinky at RTs to start"

"Boobs never offend, but sometimes tits do"

"Chester Creek Cafe has the worst breakfast potato- I would rather eat a McHashbrown"

I'm sad about the new Greek restaurant that will be opening above RT's later this fall because my favorite Indian restaurant is gone.

Thai Krathong's food is good by Duluth standards but it doesn't taste as good as the food at any other Thai restaurant I've ever been to.

I love Luce's Rustler.

If you hit "refresh" when you are on the post page, the newest comments show up. I noticed that sometimes I have to not only refresh the home page to see new posts, but once I click on the post itself, it sometimes needs refreshing too. The new posts are there - just hiding a little.

OK - I'll play the game later when I have more time.

Just a helpful little commercial.

Also - I would exponentially rather hear someone say "deece" than "retarded" - that was a HUGE swear word in our house, right up there with the "N" word. Sooooo not cool.

"That's gonna be tits" could be translated as "That's just going to blow (the roof off)."

I looked it up from "tit for tat". Cheated (shrugs sheepishly). I guess I don't know as much about language as I thought. Hmmph.

Not sure I'm right, though.

Laws are merely governmental suggestions, reinforced with guns.

eco eco,

I agree about the Thai place, but it has its moments. My favorite thai restaurant is in Madison, but what can you do?

Try Krathong's triple delight appetizer, double yum.

For people not in the know, you can order up to 10 stars if you are inclined to spiciness. It really depends on who's cooking, though.

With the website, I'm sure eventually Barrett and/or whoever helps will make moves to modify again to a new revision, but I'm not complaining about the way it is. Everybody would like to recruit the guys from google, but considering the fact that this forum is free and has no enforced ads, I think it's good for now. Good job, Barrett. I have UI complaints also but just push them aside for now.

i have always thought the Mt. Royal branch library was a sorry excuse for a library. i only went there to use their return bin because it was close to my house.

people who think they are too good to use the bus make me grind my teeth.

likewise with people who spend 100% of their days off operating loud lawn-maintenance machinery.

people who vacuum the outdoors make me reconsider my opposition to owning a gun.

whenever i look at McCain, his face stiffness/scar/ whatever-the-hell-it-is makes me think he has an implant that controls what he says.

i'm not going demonstrating at the RNC because i personally seem to have two toggles/settings right now when confronting the Dark Lords: recklessly throwing myself on the barricades and setting myself on fire or dissolving into a puddle of uncontrollable tears. this seems unproductive.

now that i've learned to cook, all restaurants in Duluth seem to offer weak imitations of food.

(as i write these, i realize we're all rather poor imitations of Ramos's Transistor column.)

I like white bread and salami.

Keep posting. As soon as we reach 100 comments, there will be cake and a party.

I think ynnaD is backwards

Danny actually has the funniest comment so far. (fat/Disney = hilarity!)

Taste of Saigon is not remotely Vietnamese. Barely Chinese.

The Duluth Farmer's Market Sucks.

Robyn Hitchcock is god.

The Twin Cities are over-rated.

Duluth weather is great cuz I rarely have to wear shorts which prevents others from seeing something scary.

Park Point is over-rated.

Speaking of Thai restaurants, there appears to be a new one opening up across the street from the Piggly Wiggly. It seems that crappy Cantonese grub will not fly in upper Woodland

thank god! that place was horrid.

For how high Superior's property taxes are, they sure don't have much to offer.

Grandma's Sports Garden doesn't pass as a "dance club".

The Iron Range is trapped in 1985. On the bright side, you can still walk into a bar up there and hear Twisted Sister.

People that drive the speed limit in the left lane should be fair game for NASCAR-like fender taps.

Hockey is the best sport to watch in person, yet the worst to watch on TV.

Uttering the word "change" in Duluth is the equivalent of throwing a lit cigarette into a Chinese fireworks factory: A very loud noise will ensue.

Best ribs in town: Eddie's Supper Club

Best gyro in town: Kosta's

Ordering a gin martini at last call is a horrible, horrible mistake.

Gas station coffee is far better on a dollar for dollar basis.

In my hopes and dreams, there is a place, outside of Merry Olde England, that makes decent fish 'n' chips. My quixotic quest has taken me far and wide within the midwest.

The Old Chicago restaurant in Canal Park is just the latest in a long line of failed contenders. They really should rename these "Soggy Fish Sticks and Tarted up French Fries" on the menu. And where the hell was the promised vinegar for the fries...er...chips?

Perhaps it is my fault for looking for love in all the wrong places but it couldn't hurt to turn the fryer a little hotter.

My soul is filled with tepid fryer grease and burnt cracklin's

All 'City-idiots' pay a toll at Thompson Hill before they invade for their weekend vacations. Shortfall, what shortfall?

I think the Holiday Center and the downtown Library are the two most bad-ass ugliest buildings in Duluth.

I thought Mayor Ness was elected in part b/c he vowed to attract young professionals to Duluth not drive them away.

Visit Duluth succeeds in spite of themselves, not because of their efforts. I've never seen such a group of clowns in my life.

I love Northern Waters Smokehaus sandwiches! Best in town.

Bruce Springsteen should have been tapped by Obama to be his VP, he'd get my vote!

-Bruce Springstein aways has a look on his face like he's in the middle of a huge dump

-Corn is unhealthy and smells bad

-I hate that my wife got us "South Park" checks. It's embarrassing

-I think John McCain has a funny name

-I still miss Axl

-The Decepticons could have won the war if they woud have just called the Autobots the Autobutts

-The calcuator watch will rise again

I didn't know Mr. Springsteen swung that way. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

My ears ring with "I'm Going Down"

Forgot one:

-pistoffnick is a funny motherfucker

I've heard that a new Thai restaurant is moving into the former Saigon Cafe space. I can't wait to try it out.

In the meantime, I'll have to keep eating sandwiches from Northern Waters Smokehaus.


No one else here commented twice on this light-hearted post. Why did you? I encourage you to examine this question closely. You seem to have no life outside of the internet. Why? Dig deeper into the concepts of humor and timeliness, and hopefully you will cease to embarrass yourself.

Blogger Police

Everyone does NOT think they are a doctor, lawyer, cook, poet, webmaster or politician, but they do all think they are graphic designers.
And the world does not revolve around music.

blogger police:

Well, even though that's not true, I am still sorry.

I have to admit, I do now feel a sick sense of pride that I am now the ONLY person thus far to have posted 4 times on this thread.

Ok. You're all right. I'm a douchy troll. Damn Sailor Jerry.

I think we all knew Danny was an alcoholic who sits around drinking alone staring at his computer. It was good to hear him admit it.

In Duluth, east means north and west means south. All logic in this town follows suit.

Claire - despite being female - has sprouted a hard on for Visit Duluth.

House of Donuts had the best Mexican food (soft shell tacos) ever.

Contrary to popular local belief:

~It is possible to enjoy a night at Gmas Sports Garden AND Pizza Luce'

~Duluth is not any better than Superior, it is personal preference.

~The Anchor has become white noise and is not the be all/end all in the world of burgers.

~Wine is just as good (if not better) than beer.

~College students are not as bad as they are made out to be.

I invented the word trend that is "redic." Seriously. You can't imagine how cool it feels to invent slang.

long time "lurker" first time posting. this by far has been the best i've seen on PDD in awhile.thanks!!!

- I feel that we should combine both food processing and word processing into one device thus allowing us to eat our words

- If women have it, why is it called "MENopause"

- It's not college students that are the problem, it's any neighbor who doesn't care.

- We absolutely need a trader joes in Duluth.

The Dewitt Seitz building is the most underrated building in Canal Park. It should be the centerpiece of the business district.

A splash of ginger ale in a screwdriver makes the cocktail SO MUCH BETTER.

The Big Lebowski gets funnier the more you watch it.

"Jackbag" is the best non-vulgar insult. Ever.


I believe it's called "menopause" because when we encounter a woman in the midst of it, we pause--wondering what we can possibly say that won't get us killed or maimed.

My 10 year old is blasting Hannah Montana as I type, and all I want to know is -- where's the beef? Why are kids listening to her instead of Springsteen?

STOP BIRD PORN! It is America's obsession with watching birds making whoopee that our young soldiers are dieing in Afganistan.

The word "redic" figures prominently in the 1945 Ray Milland movie The Lost Weekend, so unless Shane is over 70 years old, his claims to that word are pure hubris.

"somebody stole a purse"

C-freak, I almost just fell off my chair.

i love that movie!

mmmmmmm.....I loves me some hubris.....

A map of Lake Superior looks like an angry shark.

My boobs itch at the Anchor Bar but I scratch someone's else's.

Old ska (original Jamaican) is the most under-rated good-time, summer music.

A bra and a bro do not mix.

Television is a good device to get information, nothing more, nothing less.

Mac versus PC....they're both just tools. Mac is just more efficient.

I've never seen that movie and had never heard the word used before, so technically, I reinvented it. I was too lazy for all 4 syllables of ridiculous, so settled on redic. Same meaning, only shortened and the i switched to an e. I can also be credited with "evench" pronounced eee-ventch for those too lazy to say eventually. Again, cutting the syllables in half, although anything ending in "ually" takes even more energy to say, as "ually" is 2 syllables but sounds like 3.

I have lots more to come. I have big plans for the English language and improving the efficiency of speech through slang. Expect big things out of me.

I don't know what hubris is. Don't you dip crackers in it or something? I'm sure it could be shortened to hube. Just like pubic hair can be pubes. I wish that one was mine.


Language laziness is only a symptom of what is wrong with our culture. (hate radio, SUVs and reality TV are a few others). I prefer slang that actually adds syllables to a word. Ridiculosity being a new word describing how ridiculous something has become. Not unlike this thread.

John McCain looks extremely creepy when he smiles.
Appliances and tires in Lincoln Park somehow don't add to its charm.
The Anchor is a miserable place to go when they're busy and your really hungry.
Once Duluth sells its parks it has passed the point of no return.
Sushi restaurants don't belong in gas stations.

I was just polled by a republican pollster. She asked if I support domestic drilling. She also asked if during economic downturns, if we should raise taxes or cut spending. These idiotic questions are too black and white. People are going to say, "Cut spending" and then the republicans will say that the American people don't want taxes raised. I want the taxes of corporations and rich people raised, but not the middle class. I don't want domestic drilling to be the only solution, and I don't want it in game reserves or anything. That is what is wrong with politics and with the republicans, especially. How idiotic? Simplistic morons.

The worst slang word made by shortening a regular word is 'za. As in, "Let's go to Sammy's and get some 'za." It's grating.

Mr. McCain looks creepy even when he isn't smiling. I suspect the reptilian alien overlord who has infested his body hasn't quite figured out how to drive it yet.

Us vs. Them is so 2D. It's really me against all you bastards. Now get the hell out of my lane. I got places to be.

Except for "Blinded by the Light" or some selections from "Nebraska", Bruce Springsteen's songwriting is horrible.

Bobby Dylan was an awesome songwriter but can't sing worth shit.

Why do the good musicians go bad when they get religion? Cat Stevens, Bob Dylan, Stuart Davis?

The Meat Puppets were better when they were on drugs.

Emo kids crack me up. Angst is funny, but can you quit trying so hard? Yes the world is miserable, horrible and lonely. Its also too short.

A new Thai place just opened in the Village Mall. Thai Krathong is moving into Canal Park near Hell's Kitchen this fall. Their soups are transcendent and have the power to heal.

There may be better burgers than the Anchor, but for my money you can't beat the combo of taste, price, and atmosphere of the Anchor. RIP Tommy Anderson.

Love is nothing more than a chemical imbalance.

I like shrimp.

I use crab cake appetizers as a barometer to measure a restaurant. If a chef can make a decent crab cake, it is likely that he or she can make a great entree. Good crab cakes are hard to make. The secret to good crab cakes (and good sex) is hot oil and perfect timing. Sadly, I am adept at neither.

I have eaten many things in my life - cow stomach, cow heart, pigs ears, goat, donkey, dog flesh, fish eyes, snails. I like nearly everything except for raisins. Why would you squander the grandeur, the beauty, the deliciousness of a grape by baking it in the hot sun? Vile, filthy carcass of a once noble fruit. Its once bloated soul has flown. All that is good in a grape is stolen by the greedy sun. A cinnamon roll becomes less than the sum of its parts the instant you add raisins.

Politics is a piss-poor way to solve societal problems. Politicians (of whatever stripe) quietly, deliberately steal all that is good from us (grapes) while returning to us, with loud fanfare, shriveled raisins.

Be your own grape.

~~ according to Fox News (a.k.a. the Republican party)...tax cuts for business and the wealthy are called tax cuts/tax cuts for anyone else is called socialism.

~~Nobody told it like it was like George Carlin.

~~The P.R.I.D.E Festival is not an "unchristian" event.

~~John McCain will be wearing Cowboy garb before to long.

~~The Big Lebowski will never get old.

There really isn't much difference between expensive vodka and cheap vodka. Both are distilled in the same fashion. And after three or four doubles, I can't taste the difference between either.

(but they are infinitely better than the yeasty excretions of beer or wine.)

Ha ha! Yer drinking yeast shit!

Similarly, there isn't much difference between Democrats (barley fed yeast shit) and Republicans (grape fed yeast shit). They both waste your money, blur your vision, and make you want to hurl.

Drink cheap vodka and stick it to both men.

What have we learned so far from this thread:

1) We all have our reality, and we filter info to fit that reality.

2) My reality is true, and your reality is really fucked up.

I second baci's call for a Trader Joes!!!

since we're giving bayfront musical numbers an early curfew..
i think the airshow should be re-routed or canceled because the jet engine noise scares my baby, the fireworks should be over by 8 p.m. because they make my neighbor's dog bark, and we should cancel grandma's marathon so that no one gets pee on their bushes.

If my daughters make it to age 18 without ever wearing short shorts with the word "JUICY" printed on the ass, I will consider myself an adequate father.

If there were no domestic drilling, what country would all the dentists move to? And the jackhammerers? And the people fooling around with their maids and butlers?

We need Bruegger's Bagels next to Trader Joe's.

I like pistoffnick's style!

Nate is a Liberal SISSSSSY!!
(and he whines to much)

Albert Einstein may have been a genius but he never figured out how to sail a boat.

Einstein hated wearing socks.

"He who joyfully marches to music in rank and file has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, science for him the spinal cord would fully suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, senseless brutality, deplorable love-of-country stance, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action! It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder." -- Albert Einstein, the hypocrite who worked on the Manhattan Project, which led to the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, arguably the greatest terrorist event in world history.

What a waste of a brain! Although I can understand the sock thing.

Yes, I'm sure Einstein had a personal beef with Japan.

He was all for making weapons, but after looking at the letters he wrote to FDR, it was not for the reasons you suspect. It was a flexing of the muscle side-benefit to get money to study nuclear power as an energy source. He was milking the cow with soft hands, as it were.

if my daughter makes it to 18 without owning a CD by a boy band or wearing makeup, and chooses Jong and Tan over Oprah's book of the month, I'll consider myself an adequate father.

if my son never tries to emulate a "pro" wrestler, decides he wants to serve his country by joining the Navy, and actually learns something from my mistakes, I'll consider myself an adequate father.

Everyone should watch Harvey, Harold and Maude, and It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World at least once in their lives.

Crab cakes and sex should NEVER be used in the same sentence.

I'm still looking for a shorter route to India.

tits and boobs are both aces in my book.

Letters. Words. Thoughts. Intentions. All are noise. Actions are the only signal with which to accurately judge a man.

Albert's actions prove him a full-of-shit hypocrite.

The end never justifies the means.

And from rumors, he had his soft hands on many a mammary.

Sorry, he stays on my shit list. Brilliant - yes. Hero - no.

My daughter has a boy band's cd and I'm more than an adequate mother.

Kids like what they like. Their tastes don't have to mirror ours.

Ericka Jong's novels are horrifically dated.

The glaring Oprah sticker on the front of a book might be embarrassing, but if a person is actually reading John Steinbeck, Pearl S. Buck, Leo Tolstoy, William Faulkner, and Toni Morrison (all Oprah selections), you shouldn't criticize the manner in which they were turned on to it.

No boy bands. They must listen to hair bands if they want to grow up right.

Mark Twain's novels are dated as well. Ain't got nuttin-ta-do-whit whether they are good or not.


They say you can't learn anything just by reading a book. I counter that, despite most of my high school teachers best efforts*, I earned a diploma by reading books, showing up, and figuring shit out. High school was a waste of my time.

* Ms. Teideman gets a pass, but only because she was way hot and smarter than me.

Compulsory education does more damage to those in either end of the curve than if they were left to figure it out on their own.

I used to think John Cusack was the best actor, but now I realize that he wasn't acting in most of those movies. He was just being John Cusack.

but Oprah shouldn't have to tell people to read Buck, Steinbeck, Tolstoy, Faulkner and Morrison. People should read that stuff on their own, and not because a celeb personality cult says they should (therein lies my point.) If anything, a look at her (hazel's) parent's book collection should give at least a little insight as to what she'll be reading.

I will credit Oprah fr doing some good however. At least she's getting people reading things they probably wouldn't have.

That said, I'd like to see what she'd do with Kesey, Robbins and maybe...Ginsburg.

Howl anyone?

How does one unring a bell?

One can't but one could snap the striking instrument in little pieces, and shove those pieces under the fingernails of the bellringer and then throw him out of the belltower. Thus silencing the bell from ringing again.

Well, until they send a bigger, stronger bellringer.

Alternatively, one could fashion hundreds of bells and ring them in pleasing patterns causing listeners to find the original bell monotonous.

Though if you start playing Christmas tunes on said set of bells before Thanksgiving, you better protect your fingernails. There are limits to what I will tolerate.

No bellringers were harmed in the writing of this post. I'm a lover not a fighter. Though not a lover of monotonous bells.


everything sucks.


Whole wheat beats wonderbread.
John Goldfine also wears no socks.
Kids who have to wear Holister make me sad.
Danny still sucks.


a look at her (hazel's) parent's book collection should give at least a little insight as to what she'll be reading.

good luck with that, zra! i have the coolest book collection in town, and it might as well be invisible to the kids, age 12-14. they will read what their friends turn them onto, unfortunately. sometimes it's the "you should try this" that turns them right around in the other direction. (i read crap at that age, too. i figure they might get interested in something more interesting some day.)

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