I’m one of those who follows the signs that say USE BOTH LANES when backed up and TAKE TURNS AT THE MERGE, which means take turns at the merge to me. I’m pretty sure these signs, their positioning, and the whole setup have been thought out and planned to make the situation as easy as possible for everyone.

Despite those instructions, it seems a majority of people decide to fall in line to the right, maybe assuming they’re eventually going to have to merge anyway. This creates a very long backup in the right lane and a wide open left lane up to the merge, which leads to angry drivers in the right lane who see others cruising by them in the left lane. If a majority of us would actually drive through this the way I think it was intended, I think it would be a lot smoother, similar to the second merge going west from downtown, where traffic spreads out a little and left laners can seamlessly get right without anyone having to slow down at all.

I bring this up after seeing the attempts by some to take up both lanes and actually getting swerved at yesterday for using the wide open left lane. Thank goodness the kids weren’t in the car. Seriously who “fake swerves” their vehicle at another moving vehicle?

Am I wrong here? And if not, how do we get everyone through this as intended? I’ve seen letters to the DNT addressing this and basically saying the same thing I am, obviously without impact.

It was the battle of Rawk vs. Roll. Electric vs. Acoustic. And it all started at a park in Duluth one day in early May, Circa A.M.

The Plow Boys wanted to play Keep Aways from Scott Gusts, while Stel & Lefty wanted to play Duck Duck Punch with The Surfactants. The Good Colonels tried to Indulge everyone in a Path Annu toward peaceful negotiations, but that was a First Class Failure when Bill Reichelt yelled, “I don’t like either one of those Sports!” and started beating The Fontanelles with his Lisa Kane made of Clyde Iron, breaking their Portraits of Judith. In retaliation, Steve Isakson stole the Batteries out of all their Cars & Trucks. That caused the Paradigm Collapse as Ashley Northey exclaimed, “That’s Theft By Swindle,” and things got really Undesireables.

The Thunder Brothers advanced first, leading with their Filthy Hippie Cock and shouting in their Bradical Boombox voices, “Bone Appetit!” Charity Huot, who had just arrived on her Tryke, gasped, “Malec! Your Manheat smells like Fish Heads.” The Iron Range Outlaw Brigade came to her aid as Matt Ray & Those Damn Horses rode up flinging Little Black Books and The Bricks at The Brothers Band. It was a pretty Equal Exchange with lots of Bitter Spills when, suddenly, the ground started to shake.

A gigantic Tim Kaiser, who is Mikey Talented, came Uprising Fromundas the earth like a Humanoid, emitting K-Tones at a Boku Frequency and wielding a loaded MC1980. “Excuse Me Princess,” he calmly said to Shana David, “They call me Mr. Kickass.” He grabbed Eric Rhame’s Timber & Steel Band and went after Old Knifey & the Cutthroats, threatening them “You will Die(ode).” They wouldn’t back down, replying, “You’re a Dead Man Winter!” Just as The Two Beat Band joined the whole Crew Jones in a chaotic Spin Collective, a Coal Car Caboose roared in from Hotel Coral Essex carrying James Moors, who found a Sitter just in time to join the fight. And Jeffrey James O’Loughlin flew in from his Voyages on a Rocketship To Nowhere. When the Xhaust cleared, Philip of Nazareth appeared like a Road Warrior before the 500 Million Society in this park that looked like it had been Trampled By Turtles.

“Yeltzi!” exclaimed Ariane Norrgard, who had just swallowed the Wurm and looked a little Duray & Green. “D-D-D-Dios Mio!” stuttered Aurora Baer, who had been arguing with Rusty Borealis over naming rights of the skyline to the North. “Ballyhoo!” shouted Drewcifer. All Philip said was, “This is violent, but What Four? The DTs don’t add up. Leif Acoustic alone.”

Just like that, all The Biochemical Characters turned into Cancer Romancer & The Fortune Friends. They all agreed to blame the whole ordeal on the Sweetgrass and played something called the Homegrown Kickball Classic. The next Three Song Sunday, they all confessed their sins to Father Hennepin and sang together in the Retribution Gospel Choir. Bill Flannagan hosted a Rosebud Social afterward and Uncle Kenny held a Blue Water Dance for everyone. It was Peer Precious.

The entire ordeal was recorded by someone Somewhere, But Who we’re not sure. The People Say Fox, but Nobuddie knows except maybe Nimo the Hooligan. The main thing is This Is Now, and everyone is having Cellodreams when The Moon is Down. Once again, everything is Alrights.

Charter for Compassion trailer from TED Prize on Vimeo.

And visit PeaceOneDay.org

Weather doesn’t look great, but it’s sure to be better than last year’s miserable conditions – and that was a blast.

First 120 people will get a free “Saturday Comedy Night” ticket for the Dubh Linn’s shows, and a 2 for 1 “Friday Comedy Night” ticket that includes dinner (so only $15 for two people to enjoy comedy AND dinner).

Other door prizes include Bayfront Reggae Festival passes, golf at Nemadji, drinks at ACES on 29th, a free teeth-whitening at Downtown Dental Care, a 30-minute psychic reading or animal communication consultation, Happy Space PositiveWear, Papa Murphy’s pizzas, CDs and other gift certificates.

1. The shirts are local.
2. They have a positive impact through their message and the organizations that benefit from the proceeds. More positive can only dilute the negative.
3. They all have at least something to do with art or humanity. And I know there are a lot of artists and humans in the PDD community.
4. At least two of them can be related to music, which I’m guessing will win the approval of Culture Czar Baci (kidding Baci, but I do like that title).

Hopefully, that’s enough to qualify. If not, feel free to remove. And yes, I have permission from Fatboy Slim’s management to use his music.

Thanks!

They can pick up an official Art Jam poster entry at Papa Murphy’s (Kenwood, Superior, West Duluth) and return it by March 13 for a free mini pizza!

artjamtvpromo